Cooking Calamities Fan Gifts

Disaster in the kitchen.

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

Roasted

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

It's all gravy.

Waiter' You betta stop that food fight, you SILLY fools! Here comes the Maitre D' !'

Bake off: Flan B

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

'So, not your favourite restuarant anymore...'

"Ahoy!"

'Something in the fridge has gone off.'

"Are you still waiting for the pancake to come down?"

"What are you looking up, recipes for disaster?"

'Honey, I think you have an error message coming in from the kitchen.'

'3 hamburgers, 2 servings of fries, 1 vanilla shake...'

'Believe it or not you're our greatest liability Jones!'

"...Oh no, not you. You couldn't be satisfied with one saucepan..."

Killer Apple Pie Threatens Earth.

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

"That's not the boiling oil, that's my casserole!"

"Oh my god- the salad's on fire!"

Honey, come eat your oatmeal before it sets!

'That new recipe didn't quite work out. Do you fancy popping down to the chippy?'

Hot dog carts collide

Dinosaur Dining

'Before I bring it in,darling-don't forget you married JANIE Oliver and not Jamie!'

'Today I discover fire, tonight she burns dinner.'

'I told you she is a bad cook - that's just defrosting the chips.'

"My apologies, sir. Our chef forgot to take his beta-blocker."

Sandwich Fail