Contractual Cupid Gifts

"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."

Barman In Love.

Woman tries to catch a footballer.

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

Valentine Vaccines

Pete was too shy to tell Jenny how he really felt about her instead he just sent flowers over the internet.

Valentines

"Try a danged head shot!"

'I think Benjamin like me. He linked my homepage to his homepage.'

Happy Valentine's Day.

"Damned if they do and damned if they don't? This is BRILLIANT work, everybody! Why didn't we think of this before?"

'Of course being on short term contract, I don't enjoy the same benefits as the rest of you.'

Valentine's Day

'Mandy is playing cupid again!'

Valentines

Next time you send a Valentine message over the office intranet remember not to press 'send all'.

"We're offering twenty million plus incentives over a four-year period, Mrs. Morton. Can Timmy come out and play?"

"I'm internet dating. I'm looking for someone I can morph and tweak."

It's raining men

"He decided to become a divorce lawyer!"

"Well Frank, now I've met you, I think I'll adjust my visibility, click profile, locate visibility options and make myself available for a second date..."

'If you're going to send messages on the office intranet make sure you know who's going to get them.'

'I absolutely refuse to sign anything which requires a microscope and a stepladder to read it!'

'You will tweet a tall dark stranger.'

"What do you have that'll act like a virus on a computer date?"

Valentine's Day.

"Be honest, are you internet dating somebody else?"

My friend really wants to meet you. He Googled your operating system and thinks you two are compatible, a perfect match. He's looking for a partner to grow into obsolescence with. Oops --- he's not powered up. Go ahead, buddy! You're on.

'Your company is looking at a lengthy, expensive legal battle. By any chance, did you keep your fingers crossed when signing contracts?'

Why did you think the prenup lawyer gave me such a good deal?

'Pinky swear doesn't cut it anymore. My attorney has a few documents for you to sign.'

"Put your profile pic on HotSquatch.com, what have you got to lose?"

Computer dating service.

"A bow and arrow is SO 18th century."

'I think the idea of an online dating service for seniors is fine. I just don't think we should name it, 'TimesRunningOut.com.''