Contract Kingpin T-Shirts

"This is my lawyer, my lawyer's lawyer and my lawyer's lawyer's lawyer!"

"The government thought that because we're independent scientists we'll back them up as long as the money's ok. I told them that was true and we got the contract!"

'Upset at you for breaching the non-compete? Of course not.'

'It's my company, I'll decide whether I want to go to the partner's meeting or not.'

You gotta hand it to the old man, he still knows how to motivate!

The Complete Book of Baby Names. Oooh, what do you think of 110101110110? Isn't that cute?

'You can't put him out to pasture - he owns the pasture!'

"I know you think this sort of thing is nonsense sir, and I hate to prove you wrong. But according to my crystal ball, you're not going to give me the raise I'm about to ask for."

'Sure, we pay them for protection but there are unexpected bonuses: nobody can tenderise veel like Luigi or slice beef as fine as Vinny.'

Mr. Blok goes bowling.

Will work for Food Network.

'You have the contract drafted by the lawyer. This is his bill for it.'

'CPA's' evolving into 'Consultants'

'I think it's past its sell-by date.'

"If they don't show up soon I'll have to admit I forgot to invite them."

'I have enough confidence in our project to put our money where our lawyer's mouth is.'

"A handshake is as good as a thirty-page contract, eh, Mr. Harrison?"

Corporate Lawyers

"Of course I got rid of him...in my own way."

'So, what are the terms of use?'

'New Years Resolutions, paragraph 45, clause iv in which we will attempt to clarify the term 'butter buttocks'.'

Boss talking to lawyer, 'These new Terms and Conditions you've drafted for us are extremely long and overly complex - our customers are never going to be able to understand them. Well done Jones!'

'Building Inspectors During Their Off Hours.'

'Where do I see myself in five years? Well, doing your job of course!'

'There was a catch to my lawyer's pro bono offer.'

'Don't tell me we've been following the wrong light!'

"I say this as a friend, Tom...we always know when you're bluffing!"

"Do you realize that by signing this you're entitled to nothing my client has accumulated before he met you?" "Yes."

Worker doing impression from the end of Titanic.

"OK, let's go to contract."

Safety Pin

"Excuse me, One has not actually signed the agreement yet!"

'Man, I hate it when he goes crowd surfing.'

"This franchise deal looks great! But I can't see the fine print."

Whisk