Contingency Planner T-Shirts

'I need five weekly lesson plan books. Not only do I tend to overplan, but I feel more comfortable with contingency plans.'

'I need five weekly lesson plan books. Not only do I tend to overplan, but I feel more comfortable with contingency plans.'

Plan B 1/2

'The law is all about planning.'

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

IRMA Hurricane Recovery in Cuba

"Try to get him away from that bloody whip...Pass it on."

"Siri, find an ICU near me."

'Now listen: Based on the position of the kennel and the length of the leash, only the shaded part of the garden is dangerous...'

'If all goes according to plan, this garden should reach crisis proportions by midsummer.'

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

Catastrophe Risk Insurance

What's your contingency plan, Randy? My what? If a calamity of biblical proportions were to strike here in Canardville, would you flee across the bridge to Candorville? Or would you search in vain for a fallout-resistant bunker, before surrendering to the cruel inevitability of your demise? I ask just for the sake of discussion. No reason to panic. Totally unrelated: I just found out someone who's definitely not me is selling fallout bunkers at buy-this-now-if-you-want-to-live.com. Very bad man.

'Relax. This is only a test.'

"Can you estimate how much money you'll need for your mid-life crisis?"

Tsunami Evac Route

'Who should be contacted in case of an accident? Why, 911, of course. And these people are going to be teaching my children.'

'To prepare for Y2K, I backed up all discs and documents. . . stockpiled water and non-perishables. . . converted my investments to cash and set up a wood burning stove.'

'Our policy is quite plain. We don't pay out on claims we can't pronounce.'

The other day during the zombie apocalypse

Customer tangled up in velvet rope is trying to ring bell for help.

"Instant coffee? Little plug-in water heater?? This new guy must be a real survivalist!"

'My backup special...'

'I'm taking no chances.'

'The end is near.'

"Here it is - 'Surviving an Earthquake'..."

Saving up for a rainy day.

'If the Mayan calendar is right, how should I back up my files?'

"Chief, I'd like a four-year sabbatical to prepare for the millennium."

"My cousin is lucky, he lives on the 14th floor. I'm sure he has a great view of the end of the world."

"Do I have a personal preparedness plan in case of a national emergency? Well, if screaming while running amok is a plan, then yes, I have a plan."

'So much for Plan B!'

"It's my life line in case the rapture happens, so I'm not left behind."

10/03/17 14:03