Contest Fan Pillows

'The employee who guesses closest to the correct number of beans in this jar will be awarded this year's annual pay increase! -Management, ATOZ Accountants

The Sculptor

'I win!'

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

'Rhea of the Year.'

'This is our top negotiator's office.'

"Wow, fishing sure is fun. I can't believe I caught such a big fish my first time out."

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

'Jack's foursome gives out trophies at the end of the year...he came in fourth!'

'The contest brought in only twenty two wrappers...'

Tug the Toggle

"Foul!"

You are no longer in jeopardy.

"Ha!...I'd like to see the Jones' trying to beat our display this year!"

Scott finds Amundsen got to Pole first and cries

Too late they realized they'd awarded 1st place to a mop.

"Congratulations to Miss Jupiter."

'You guys like to get into the holiday spirits?'

'Before I throw can you tell me if my feet are behind the line?'

'The thing I liked best about being an amateur is that the other guy was an amateur too!'

The Apprentice

'You're excited about winning a traveling toothbrush kit in a sweepstakes after spending $300 on postage and entering 1,500 contests?'

Mind Your Valuable Grey Matter

Angel Wins Publisher's Clearing House

"Funnily enough, I do actually have two left feet..."

'And we can count to eight. That's more than you can say for them.'

Winner of Horse jumping competition hit by loser

Knobbly knees champion

'I must say, that's the most pathetic bar promotion I've ever seen.'

"Good news. We're the hundredth caller."