Conspiracy Theorist Fan Gifts

Facelook

That conspiracy theorist makes it sound so sinister that I'm keeping an eye on my younger sister for my mom. Big brother is watching!

"Son, when you go by earth, please pick me up a cow and a drunk guy fro your dad!"

The Anti-Agent

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

Santa, Alien, Easter Bunny and Sasquatch plan the perfect caper.

Bermuda Triangles

The Circular Logic of Fascism

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

Extinction of the dinosaurs fully explained

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

New Road Signs to Watch For:

Alien Assumption

"My latest sighting turned out to be just another weather balloon."

"Walt Disney on ice."

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

The Da Vinci Cod

"No, Mother, I don't think Julian Assange is going to leak your recipe for fruitcake."

"Do you think the flat earth society has members round the globe?"

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

'To paraphrase Franklin Delano Roosevelt: The only thing we have to fear is the NSA, FBI, CIA, DEA, IRS, DIA, EPA, FTC, FCC...'

Gremlins 47

An alien tries to hitch a lift at the side of the road

'Oh my!...Corn circles, Roswell, aliens, pyramids - there's a connection!...'

The evidence destroyed

Welcome: Skeptics Society

'Of course I'm paranoid and delusional, dummy! -- I was abducted by aliens, for crying out loud!'

Legalish

'Eat the grass in perfect circles. It drives them crazy.'

"I remember driving to Roswell and then it goes blank."

"I've thought about what you said, about how plate tectonics will kill us all!"

What can I get you? An explanation for why we haven't gone back to the moon. Would you like the rational explanation or the Youtube explanation? Rational would be lovely, please. Ok. We never went back to the moon because there was no reason to. The whole point of Apollo was to reassure the free world that we could beat the Soviet Union. Mission accomplished. Oh ... that's it? Well, that's rather bland. Could I exchange that for the Youtube explanation? The lizard-men who live on the film set wh