Conscious Contributor Gifts

"Promise you'll spend it only on locally-grown healthful produce?"

"Good For You / Bad For You"

...And he calls himself the 'Green' Giant...

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"This is locally grown and good for the environment, but it may give you greenhouse gas."

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

'Do you ever think about how we can reduce our global footprint?'

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

'The U.S. has less than 5% of the world's population, but consumes 25% of its natural resources. Pretty outrageous, isn't it?'

'Are you sure these sprouts aren't GM?.'

This week is obscure charity awareness week.

Supermarket Aisles: 'Good for the Environment' and 'Couldn't give a flying F@$#! about the environment!'

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"

ONE MORNING WHILE GETTING DRESSED,

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

The Climate Change Debate Explained

'Yes, the wood on this pencil is from a renewable source.'

'Of course, I buy only organic foods... I like to be environmentally friendly.'

"You can take it with you down here - but no social conscience funds."

Horn of Plenty.

"Do you have anything with FOOD in it?"

An apple a day!

Where Pleather Comes From

Amputee watches wealthy man who has a spare set of legs.

Dispatched

"Are your chickens raised without the use of growth hormones?"

"Hey, bro...it's the least I could do."

Hudson River Crouton