Conscientious Objector Pillows

A Soldier's Conscience

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

"Yes, that's the tree with all the squirrels from yesterday. And no, I don't know where they are today."

The Three Kinds of People

'Thank goodness for clumsy children: A spilt ice-cream!'

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

'Judge Mental.'

"Oh, no, no, no, no! Please, NOOO!"

What can I get you? Coffee? Tea? Sandwich? The mackerel mocha sounds lovely. What's in it? The usual. Chocolate. Soy milk. Mackerel. Yes, but is the mackerel farm-raised or from the sea? Ocean. Atlantic? Pacific? Indian? Arctic? Antarctic? I'm not sure. Oh. Ok ... well what's the mackerel's mercury content? Negligible, I'm sure. Ok. Was it exposed to any chlorine? Or copper sulphate? Or malathion? Was it treated with kindness? Was it read stories and sung to before bedtime? Yes. Never mind, it s

'Let's arbitrate.'

Minimalism exhibition...

Man with t-shirt: 'I think, therefore I don't vote'

Opposing viewpoint.

'Yeah, neighborhood crime. That's what I watch all the time 'cause our TV is broken.'

"Are you listening to those bloody influencers again?"

Israeli soldier

'Wrong! I'm not delivering this pizza to your house!'

"Okay, your story checks out. You're not a Peeping Tom, you're just a creepy real estate appraiser."

Boys watching a christening

Fur Coat and Turtle Neck Protest.

What would Jesus Do

"Looking at all the stars in the sky makes me feel cosmically mindful—all my earthly concerns meaningless in the breadth of what I now witness. I’d have a better view if the Lewises would cut down those useless pine trees... Curious if those damn things are on my property. I’ll call the town surveyor in the morning and see if I can get those stupid trees removed. I hate having neighbors..."

"You have an anti-addiction...everyone just hates you!"

A man with the world on his mind inspects the world

'Say cheese.'

The best place for a dartboard is not beside an open window.

"Same to you, Buddy."

Caterpillar being magnified in glasses.

Sneaky cat.

'Who is John Galt?'

"I told you so."

'Now, this placebo is recommened by four out of five doctors.'

Audubon Guide To Neighbors

"He's a new bagger from the supermarket. He's really conscientious!"