Connoisseur Of Surprises Mugs

'Waiter, this jam tastes of fish!'

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Surprise!"

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

'Yeah, yeah, very cute... she couldn't have just sent me an e-card?'

Imagine

"Instead of playing with that boring ball you got me, I updated your computer's operating system, I cleaned your keyboard and ran an antivirus scan."

While You Were Out: We Moved!

'I made them during the blizzard in January. Whad'ya say we go liven up my sister's pool party?'

The Walk of Shame

I'm worried about Uncle Mort. He's still in jail for refusing to reveal his secret source? Not just that. It's his relationship with Sadie. I feel like … What? She says she wants him back, but I'm not sure. Why would you say something like that? Your sweetie made you a saw with a cake in it. Oooh.

"I guess one of the bunnies was a boy after all!"

"The favourite practical joke amongst Big Bang theorists"

Tuna Surprise $4.95. You have to admit - he's pretty surprising!

A kid is about to be grabbed by an oversized claw.

'Interesting resume, would you mind if I kept it overnight? I'd like to take it home with me...and scare the living daylight out of my kids.'

"Woof"

'The Entrecote a la Bordelaise? It's stuff on a plate.'

'A kissogram for the boss? It must be a mistake.'

"I'd like a wine that was born in France and then bummed around California."

"Yes, a surprise engagement. Even my husband-to-be here didn't know..."

"No worries. I'm well-prepped and ready for anything they might throw at me."

Surprise Party

'And tomorrow we will be having a surprise test.'

"Mr. Dankin, the plumber will see you now."

"Is there any way we could describe this bit of old tart that would make a Russian oligarch pay £2 million for it?"

"It's too good. I think it's going to be a forgery, not just a copy."

'Oh, you nut! I thought we agreed we weren't going to make a big fuss over birthdays anymore.'

'Well, on the bright side, we DID manage to keep it a surprise.'

It's the little surprises that keep a marriage exciting...

Happy Birthday MUM!

"I'm working on a watercolor."

The disgusting, embarrassing sound of a whoopie cushion...

Blue wine