Conference Caller Pillows

"Thank God! Someone to network with!"

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

Inclusive speech

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

"'Meetingpalooza' sounded better in the brochure."

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

"I love these off-site business meetings."

'Could we finish these negotiations via e-mail? That will allow me to think before I respond to your proposals.'

"I don't think the guy with the business-card cannon has ever been to an actual networking event,"

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

'Don't disturb me - I'm in conference!'

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

Executive Asks Death To Wait

Wearing a sales chart as a name badge.

World Food Summit - No food and drink allowed in the auditorium.

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

'Time management seminar. Start: five-ish.'

"Go ahead—unmute yourself."

'And in conclusion.'

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

"You need to turn down the vibration setting on your cell phone."

'Let me present today's speaker.'

Is that one of those wafer thin computers?

Unintelligible speaker at Subway Announcers Dinner.

Communication Breakdowns

Chaos Theory Conference.

Office worker on desert island on cell phone: 'No, I haven't seen the minutes.'

'Thanks for coming here today for my presentation, '10 cutting edge trends in the future of business analysis.' Copies of my talk will be available in the lobby in VHS and Betamax formats...'

'Pick a business card.'

"What's Tim doing on the window ledge?"

'What's the chance of getting a latte around here?'

Giant screen displays conference delegates and not the speaker.

AI Summit

"....which brings me to number one: Thinking inside the box."