Compliance Comedians Gifts

'I know it's difficult to stay in compliance, with everything, Ferguson, but this is ridiculous!'

'How sweet, they're playing 'Doctors and Nurses.''

Desk sign: "Yes, sir"

'No, smart guy -- it means all of them at once!'

'...In functionality and in dysfunctionality....'

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

"I plan to read the constitution this weekend. Is it long?"

European Union Health and Safety Direcorate rules

'...And they're giving us sixty million years to get in compliance.'

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

'What about three-day Sabbaths?'

'...Love, honor, and obey, no strings attached?'

'It's not company policy but how about starting on some performance enhancing drugs?'

Minnesota Weather.

'I thought Lobsters mate for life.'

"Kevin's job as a train announcer seriously affected his love-life..."

"I'm disabling autocorrect, because it reminds me too much of my mother-in-law."

'These people have terrible attention spans - I'll just bring them ten commandments at a time.'

"Are you talking to me?"

It is illegal to fall asleep under a hairdryer in Florida.

'You know I hate weddings - they remind me that I went through one!'

'And you, William Elwood Hoonavogel, are you willing to give up your free range status?'

Stop! Mad cows are forbidden to cross the border!

Modern animal communication

'I think it's for compliance with some Federal safety regulation.'

Snitching box.

Wedding Coin Tosser

Floor Wet When Slippery

'This new ruling on bankers pay has really thrown the cat among the pigeons...'

'You were doing the speed limit. I ofund that suspicious.'

Bureaucratic Procedures

Text in a bottle