Compliance Clown Pillows

'I think it's for compliance with some Federal safety regulation.'

'This new ruling on bankers pay has really thrown the cat among the pigeons...'

Snitching box.

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"I believe we've found the weakest link."

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

A Copy Editor and His Dog

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"Quick, Lassie, go get I.T.!"

'Will you kindly remind the rest of the staff that I'm the managing director - not the Godfather!'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

Shake it all about sign on desk

'We feel it's very important to provide our employees with an extremely comfortable work-place environment. Primarily because we don't allow them to ever go home.'

"It's the new simplified tax demand from HMRC. . . Three Questions - How much did you earn last year? How much have you got left? And how soon can you send it. . .?"

"You're new here ... it's customary on dismal Monday mornings to be miserable."

'Careful, that's where the boss keeps his ego.'

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

Brainstorm in progress.

'Kimble, I'm going to give you a chance at purchasing - nip over to the cafe and get me a cheese and pickle sandwich.'

It's all fixed. Just don't type anything that contains the letter ‘E'.

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

'Dear, you know how I hate it when you bring your work home.'

'How come, unlike some other bosses, you never surprise me with little promotions?'

"First the good news - one of us hasn't been made redundant."

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

'Maybe you should reconsider those place cards, Ms Harris?' (Negotiation talks/Good Guys/Bad Guys)

European Union Health and Safety Direcorate rules

There now, that wasn't too difficult was it!

'...And they're giving us sixty million years to get in compliance.'