Completing A Medical Degree Gifts

Mutation D614G

'I have this fear of the real world...'

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

"Let's consider an early dive."

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

Dancing Doctor

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

'Well, what do I have?...Within reason, of course.'

Fighting the Pandemic

"All my symptoms are old ... "

'My medical school believed laughter is the best medicine.

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

'Hello, I'm Dr. Frank Stein and this is my anaesthetist, Dr. Ivan Gore. We'll be doing your hernia operation tomorrow.'

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

Dog forced to return bone

'It may be more inconvenient, but the 'Reverse Prostate Exam' is a lot less embarrassing for the both of us.'

'It's a new technique for training interns: suture by numbers,'

'That was creepy. They ran short on cadavers, so we operated on the dean of students.'

'Good thing it has a child-proof cap.'

National Academy of Sport

'What's holding him up?'

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

'The doctor will acknowlege your existance now.'

"It's interpret-your-own-test-results day today."

"She keeps getting a stitch in her side."

"Gross."

En garde!

"I'll be fielding any questions you may have and my assistant, Carol, will be googling the answer."

Guide to Contagious Diseases.

'Our interns work extremely long hours. The harness will help keep them awake during your operation.'

"You're sick of this? Just try to imagine how we feel."