Commuter King Gifts

DMV: Expect Delays

"You were ferocious when you rushed to get us those seats on the Jitney."

'Hey, none of us like having to fly south every year, but couldn't you have taken a bus?'

'Yes, I can park it...but the gratuity just went up.'

'Enjoy the race race, dear.'

If you lived here, you'd probably be in some bar.

Stop Scoot

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

GAS PRICES AT PUMP

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

Wife: 'Ah, honey.....why are you covered in raw fish and rice?' Husband: 'Oh I was running late for the 6:15 and got on a darn sush train by mistake!'

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

Touring Cyclist

Packed like sardines

Three lanes of traffic with the first two lanes crowded with turtles. The third lane (to the left) a couple rabbits speeding along without any traffic. An easy pass sign has carrots replacing dollars.

"Excuse me, I think you'll find I've reserved that luggage rack space ..."

Commutobile

Scarf puts hat back on.

"Yeah, it's me. I'm gonna be late for dinner."

"Manhatten Brooklyn Hoboken Long Island"

"It's ideal for the man who works close to home."

Dancing at the Clubs.

'I'm telling ya, it's a jungle out there.'

Monday: Next 7 exits.

Caution (arrow falling from sky sign)

'I beat the 5 o'clock rush... I leave work at noon!'

I hate sitting in traffic jams. - 'Move it! I need to get work.' - 'I hate sitting at my desk.' -

'Would you like a push Dear?'

Business Duck

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

"I told you we'd be better off taking Canal."

"Everybody on the bus today was played by Anthony Hopkins."

'Thanks for flying in for the meeting.'