Commute Narrators T-Shirts

Small Talk Therapy

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

Ants dressed as businessmen going to work.

'Thanks for flying in for the meeting.'

Vampire on a plane

Another Filibuster from the Secretary of the Interior of My Car

'Next plane to Los Angeles is at 3.'

Doubledecker bus stop

'I was hoping traffic would ease up after the polar ice cap melted.'

"Take me home now!"

"I dreamed last night that I had a job within walking distance."

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

Beep' 'beep' 'beep' 'beep'' - 'Slam!' - 'Great... another long week of pain and humiliation ahead...' - ''Click'' - 'God, Ilove my job.' - '' -

Martian Rovers find proof of intelligent life on the red planet.

A man reads "Traffic Times" while stuck in traffic.

Trapeze artists commuting

Things Women Never Say: 'Sorry I'm late boss. I was talking to my husband and he wouldn't stop listening.'

'I was able to bypass the main artery...But enough about my commute to work.'

"Look out! It's the subway-marm!"

Theme Park 'n' Ride

65. Whenever I'm in the mood to watch the rest of the world go by, I simply keep to the legal speed limit.

Busker falls on deaf ears as everyone has personal stereo,

"Due to unforeseen circumstances, there will be no delays on the subway today."

Metrocard error messages

'Remind me not to carpool with Paul again.'

'Turn right at the first $4.09 unleaded, then a hang a left at $4.03 unleaded, and over the bridge, past the $4.01 unleaded...'

"I have found a house in your price range, but it will be a long commute every day from Greenland."

Hi honey, I'm on the plinth.

Being vertically challenged, I never realized my dream of becoming a pro basketball player. But on a trip to work, it was just like I was a hoops star! I spilled some coffee when walking. I dribble whenever my feet are in motion. I took a selfie when I stopped at the ATM - it was a nice bank shot. Then as I neared the office, I came down the lane - and made an impressive display of driving and dunking. I should be getting a big shoe sponsorship contract any day now!

Bus Stop Evolution

'This one's a hood ornament. I got it for carpooling.'

'I don't like this. . .'

"Me, it's not a shower I crave for after a hard day at work, it's a long, long, long bath..."

Sticker: 'How's my driving you nuts?'

"...He's been going to work in a wheelie bin. He says its quicker, cleaner and less cramped"