Common Sense Advocate Gifts

'Oh, that place...? we shut that down AGES ago!'

Always wear your helmet on site.

'In my experience, common sense is far from common. . .'

"It's o.k., come on out."

Our college is tuned to the students' every need! Campus Visits. We have body image awareness week. Safe sex awareness week. Bullying, drug use and tolerance awareness weeks. What did I miss? Welcome. History, math or English awareness week? Great idea. I'll suggest that.

This week is obscure charity awareness week.

'If elected, I promise to my darndest to keep money in politics.'

'It's a silent protest.'

"Look! It's the Montgomerys from the breast-cancer walk."

''Science is nothing but trained and organized common sense' Thomas Huxley, 1825-1895.'

'I'm getting a head start for Movember.'

Man rolling ball up a hill

National #@*&%!$@? Tourettes Institute *&%!$

Now you're going to say, "objection overruled." Objection overruled. What can I say? ESP is a gift from God.

Sewer Rats

"I know one secret! Not spending $30 on a book filled with common sense!"

'Apparently it was quite a nice country before the mining industry took hold.'

Will work for clean water.

'Please listen carefully as my campaign promise menu has changed...'

"Your results are excellent and the quality of observed lessons was very high, however we're worried by an e-mail from Mrs Miggin's hairdresser who thinks you should teach 'a bit more common sense'. . ."

"Yes, I did say I wanted a 'green' home. But not in the literal sense."

'A PENNY? What the devil's THAT?'

'What d'you mean you've been praying for a raise?'

'Don't you 'shh' me.'

"But do you feel invisible?"

'It's very rare. We don't even have a colored ribbon for it yet.'

Roadmap to peace between Israel & Palestine

When alchemy faded, chemistry began. When herbalism faded, medical science began. When astrology faded, space exploration began. I can't wait to see what happens after religion fades.

Reading 'Faking It' & 'How To Tell If She's Faking It'.

Open At Other End.

Shut Up

He's the sort of man who looks out the window, sees something wrong and does something about it.

'To bring awareness of a very important issue and how much it means to me...What part of, I'm-wearing-a-ribbon-and-you're-not, don't you understand?'

"This year I resolve to keep my political views to myself."

Elizabeth Warren, US Senator