Commitment Shy Pillows

'It can't last.'

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'No, but thanks for asking,'

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

'Is that 'forsaking all others' bit compulsory?'

'Or you can rent by the week...'

Man with lobotomy scar - "Changed my mind."

The Female Brain and The Other One

"Instead of making a long-term commitment to marriage, I've decided to lease a man."

"I really like this one – but I'm afraid of getting hurt again."

"I need to know if you're really serious about our relationship."

"'...Love, honor, cherish til death do us part'? Wait..."

Man playing with echos: 'Hellooooo...How are you....I love you...' 'I'm not ready for that kind of committment!'

"....'Sickness, health? ... better, worse... richer, poorer?'... how about leaving me some wiggle room!"

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

"I never get a girls name tattooed on a first date."

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

'We still have a few minor issues to work out: I want a huge wedding and he wants to be single.'

'I do - allowing for a 50 margin of error...'

"I need a man who will commit."

'Well, yes, when you put it that way, I am a selfish male afraid of commitment, but 'Lone Wolf' sounds better...'

'I don't know, Randy - Marriage is so INTRUSIVE.'

Dating Death

"Bernie has fear of commitment - He thinks the American Psychiatric Association is out to get him."

Woman dragging reluctant partner into Tunnel of Commitment.

"And you're telling me this because?"

Man on treadmill with one leg in a cast.

'Are you sure you want to save your marriage?'

"Or you could just give me half your stuff now and save us all the trouble."

"These oaths aren't binding all weekend are they?"

Things one would rather have left unsaid - 'I will!'