Commitment Ponderers Gifts

'Are you sure this is what you want, Steven - The cost of marriage is at an all-time high,'

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

'I'm not afraid of commitment, but forever is a really long time.'

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

"What's this for poorer stuff?"

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

The Female Brain and The Other One

"Phil, honey, do you ever think about taking our relationship to the next level?"

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought we were just dating."

'No, but thanks for asking.'

"If we take a late retirement and an early death, we'll just squeak by."

A Reasonable Time for Concern

"I need to know if you're really serious about our relationship."

"The industry has agreed to take the pensions dashboard off our hands. . ."

"It's not that I'm lazy. But I envisage myself not so much climbing the corporate ladder, as taking the corporate elevator."

'How worse? Give me the worst-case scenario.'

"The pension crisis prompted me to consider alternative invstments. Like Roulette."

"You said it—everybody heard you."

'My dad is pushing me to become an alpha male, but frankly, I'd rather be a poet...'

"We're studying the legal principles of 'crossing a heart and hoping to die'."

'We still have a few minor issues to work out: I want a huge wedding and he wants to be single.'

Woman dragging reluctant partner into Tunnel of Commitment.

"I do enjoy seeing you, Roger, but I'm not sure if you're binge-worthy."

"We'll just skip over the part that says 'until death do you part' "

"Merely dating" "Lover's leap" "Undecided? Take a hike"

"I need a man who will commit."

Jealousy

Beware of a first kiss that speaks volumes.

"I'm afraid it's 'I do' ... not 'Undo'."

I think my girlfriend is moving in.

"Monogamy? In this economy?"

'On second thought, dear, could you toss me the car keys?'