Commitment Escapist T-Shirts

"Don't feel bad if you wanna bail!"

Runaway bride on a treadmill.

"Do you guys serve beer?"

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

'We need to talk about your fear of commitment, Ralph.'

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

Exit. My problem is restaurants have drive-throughs, and fitness centers don't.

"I didn't say I started jogging, I said blogging."

"You should always stretch before engaging in strenuous activity."

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

"Don't you dare try to sneak out of this cartoon!"

'I wish you had chosen a more pertinent educational issue than 'Do Dogs Actually Eat Homework?''

Write "Brenda' but use disappearing ink

'No, I haven't taken up jogging...A velociprator was after me!'

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

'Okay, ready to begin the workout? And... finished. Good job!'

"Not again!"

Kissing Hands

"They say walking can change your life. Bye!"

Houdini 2019

'You are in a deep, deep sleep, when you awaken you will feel sweaty and exhausted...'

Bleh! That dreaded time of year had come around again. Everyone says it's torture. Prepare for the Apocalypse. Ok, class. Together we will all somehow survive

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

Message in a bottle.

"It's 10000 steps a DAY, not a YEAR!"

'Hike the Alps? I'm getting out of breath just keeping my foot on the accelerator!'

"Your essay on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your sister's"

'A lovely area, but not enough waiters!'

Sometimes you wanna go where nobody knows your name

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

"Genuine? Of course it's genuine...zirconia."