Commercial Producer Prints

'I'm a voice over artist.'

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Showbiz Awards

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

"Think of it as buying in – not selling out."

'Okay, folks, that's a wrap!'

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

Applause

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

Canadian film production

New music conference

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

'This is the last time we hire former Cirque du Soleil members as stompers.'

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

Little Red Riding Carpet

Senior Jeopardy!

"What's the final episode of 'Seinfeld' about?""It's about nothing."