Comical Relief Captain T-Shirts

Milking small business.

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Overjumpers

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

'It's the report from the consultant. He says we should turn over the turnovers to improve turnover.'

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

"Touché"

"Ever eat a bird?"

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"Trust me. Don't do it."

"It says here on your resume that one of your qualities is a sense of humor. Care to elaborate?"

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

The First Printed Bible

"Aren't we going a little overboard with Friday's casual dress code!?"

'I think my teacher has a crush on me. She's holding me back for another year.'

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

Break Glass in Case of Stress

'I love it when you cook - it lets me practice faking it.'

Tourist in the desert

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

'Let's face it...We have irreconcilable differences!'

Bureau of Missing Door Knobs

"I used to waste a lot of time explaining myself to family, friends and shrinks. Now I only explain myself to Rick."

Of course I've not dusted - You know I favour a matt finish!'

"I've changed my mind"

"Well... that rhino horn's doing absolutely nothing for me..."

"I don't want to alarm you, but it seems that what you have on your back may actually be my backpack."

When clowns run out ammunition.

'No! That's not a wall safe, it's a porthole!'

'I must be getting good, because my Dad told me to go play for the neighbours!'

"You've got pussyfooting from 10 to 11, shilly-shallying until 12, then hemming and hawing the rest of the afternoon."