Comic Relief Expert Pillows

"Aren't we going a little overboard with Friday's casual dress code!?"

"We're going in lads. . . and I won't lie to you. some of us won't be coming back."

'Don't you know too much TV is bad for your eyes...and your morals, attention span, intelligence...'

The all-swimsuit issue

No bowling shirt - No bowling shoes - No bowling

One more ring andBbob would set off the Solicitor Glove.

'Then in the fourth grade...'

Grim Reaper at Surprise Party.

Man's aching body makes all the noise in the library.

When Holy Cows Are Sent Out To 'Pastor'.

Bureau of Missing Door Knobs

"While you've been a valuable member of our softball team, there's a worker in Taiwan who's an all star."

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Overjumpers

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

'It's the report from the consultant. He says we should turn over the turnovers to improve turnover.'

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

"Touché"

"I'm trying to create a hologram of myself. If I'm successful, I'll never have to attend school, go to the dentist or go anywhere else that's boring again."

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

"Trust me. Don't do it."

"It says here on your resume that one of your qualities is a sense of humor. Care to elaborate?"

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

The First Printed Bible

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

'I think my teacher has a crush on me. She's holding me back for another year.'

"Saving Lois Lane a dozen times doesn't mean you can claim her as a dependent on your taxes."

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

'No no!! Not that one... The BIG one on the top shelf!!'

Break Glass in Case of Stress

Tourist in the desert

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

'I can't say I like your cavalier attitude Benson.'