Comedy Night Planner Pillows

'What TV dinner goes best with a sitcom?'

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

Dating is so expensive...

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

The Reaper's Arms

'Harvey, did you notice what a beautiful full moon we have tonight?'

Funnel of Love

"They haven't mated yet, but I think we're getting close."

'A rose tattoo for your lady friend sir?...' A female Tattooist offering a rose tattoo, in the way of the old Rose Ladies in clubs and pubs

'You deserve some unabashed fun once in a while.'

"What kind of biscuits are they?"

"I think we've had too much Wine. The cork-screw is surrendering."

'You wanted to go on a romantic outing. You're on a romantic outing.'

"It's a Haiku Dinner."

"I loved the bit where you hid under the seat."

scrabble love

'Take my advice kid. Enjoy yourself now, because once you get married, your free ranging days are over.'

America's funniest election gaffes

"A word of advice, sir...when your wife reaches for another slice of pizza, never, ever say, 'Are you sure you should be eating that?'"

Restaurant in the Strand.

"On time arrival...check. Paid for drinks...check. Made pleasant conversation...check. Didn't stare at mole...check."

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

"We'll go out for a quiet candlelight dinner, slowdance on the beach to the music of Barry White, then make love in a warm, cozy bed!"

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

"Hello ... Susan ... Joe ... Not ... Make ... It ... Me ... Joe's ... Robot ... Me ... Programmed ... Take ... You ... Dinner ..."

Off Off Off Off Broadway

Romantic Frogs

Romance