Comedy Contest Lover Pillows

I think it's time, sweetheart. Definitely time, Pookie. Contest time. We want to rename Rudy's generation. Generation I - for impatient? Generation V - for virtual or vapid?! Send your suggestions to asksadieshow@gmail.com. (Winners will receive nothing but lots of it!)

Tug the Toggle

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Bond James, Bond."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Showbiz Awards

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

6 Quarantine-Friendly Fashions

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

Director/Action Man toy.

Children's Parties

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

Life is for the birds.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

The first car accident.

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

"You may now kiss the bride..."

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

'I love your playing....especially when you stop!'

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

Painting by the numbers for adults