Comedy And Humor Lover Pillows

"Just a reminder, … I'll be billing all seven personalities together."

"Sorry, honey, I used up all the sunblock. How 'bout we cover you in mayonnaise instead?"

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"Bond James, Bond."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Larry's used art

Showbiz Awards

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

Grace For Flies

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

6 Quarantine-Friendly Fashions

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

"His first out-of-body experience."

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

...And he calls himself the 'Green' Giant...

Director/Action Man toy.

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

"Why do they do that?"

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."