Comedy And Humor Lover T-Shirts

"Just a reminder, … I'll be billing all seven personalities together."

"Sorry, honey, I used up all the sunblock. How 'bout we cover you in mayonnaise instead?"

No caption (Aliens ride in a spaceship. Their luggage is stowed in a clear capsule underneath the craft).

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"Bond James, Bond."

Larry's used art

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

Showbiz Awards

Grace For Flies

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

6 Quarantine-Friendly Fashions

"His first out-of-body experience."

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Director/Action Man toy.

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

...And he calls himself the 'Green' Giant...

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

'Remember only you can prevent forest fires.'

"Why do they do that?"

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf