Comedic Interpretation Seeker Pillows

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

"And last week I nearly crashed while reading on the freeway..."

Lambo

When psychiatry works too well!

'I'm all talked out. Let's look into some gene therapy.'

"When I said the surgery was minimally invasive I wasn't talking about your finances."

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

"The first week back is always the hardest"

How cats see their home

'I hope we don't start getting competition from redundant bankers homes.'

"Good Dad, Bad Dad"

'You misunderstand, squire. All I do is guarantee that my cars are USED!'

"I have to go wee-wee."

"Do I look like the sort who knows anything about lawns?"

Bob's Marriage Advice: 'Let me give you some advice on marriage, Joe. . . try to think of me as the pope. . .'

"Call a veterinary, chief. I think he's got a kidney infection..."

"I like to be disciplined about my writing, sharpening my pencils and organising my desk in the morning which leaves me time for writers block after lunch and a nervous breakdown in the evening."

"He won't get far without this!"

"I'm trying to find the end of this roll of tape ..."

"I'm a freelance radiologist."

"Of course, at present Mademoiselle's neck is too long, but our Mr. Francis is going to change all that."

"Of course I flunked the spelling test. My pencil doesn't have spell check!"

'Look at this baby, just in from Italy. You'll have to fight off the chicks, Man.'

"Wrong hole!"

Gurus wise words on lost socks

"You need to put in 10,000 hours."

'All I see is red ink!'

Garden stagger

"Travel book says do not land on Earth unless you have your own health insurance."

Wanna step outside and say that?! Don't beat yourself up. At least not until you've put something on.

'I chose the jockeys wearing the prettiest colours and I'm doing better than him!'