Comedic Cowboy Enthusiast T-Shirts

"My gun's in the shop. Let's establish a dialogue."

Well, that's what happens when you never seal the Tupperware lid properly and the biscuits go stale.

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

Dawing your Cellphone

'Who do you think you're kidding, Slim? — the ruby slippers are a dead giveaway!'

"I don't care how good he is. Ain't nobody can get a short on Jeffrey."

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

"Can't we ride off in another direction?"

'I still want to be a cowboy.'

"I broncobust and I Dust-Bust. You got a problem with that?"

"Head for the carrousel! It's our only chance!"

"Waving the hat keeps the cattle moving and lets my hair get some highlights."

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

Western Outfitters.

"...you mean this is the end of the 3 bandidoes?"

The Not So Wild West

"I dunno ... I get the feeling this is going to end very badly."

'I don't know about you, Clyde, but I'm getting a mighty uneasy feeling we could be riding straight into an ambush interview!'

"So long, Ma, I'm ridin' off into the sunset."

A dog dressed as a cowboy leans against a sign that reads "Armed response".

Louis L'Amour hones his craft.

Civil Howdy Pardnership

'Can we skip to the part where I charge with a light saber?'

"Sorry, Zak, since paintball aint bin invented yet, looks like you bin shot!"

"We could have a shoot-out, then brunch."

'Just a trim for me thanks.'

Cowboy

Cattlemans Saloon.

'When I said loosen your buckle and let 'em drop, I was talking about your gunbelt.'

Jasper's Limo Service.