Comedic Canine Chaser Pillows

'What does it look like? We've been chasing grasshoppers.'

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

Critisize your weight.

A Highlander Chasing Dogs with a Knife and a Broom.

"Dear Diary: Today I ate, groomed, napped. Ate, groomed, napped. Ate, groomed, napped ... HAIRBALL!!"

"He's very persuasive ... "

Clown Skis.

'The sty is falling!!'

"You're wasting your time, I'll never understand which one is Liam Hemsworth and which one is Chris Hemsworth."

"You can stop now. The squirrels are gone."

"I'm innocent. I've just never been able to pass up a good plea bargain."

"Do you prefer lavender scent or strawberry?"

Honey, can you see the Olympic Village from up there?

"I know I said, 'If there's anything I can do,' but I draw the line on licking your incision for you."

"If you'll excuse me fellas. I have to see a man about a dog. Specifically-this dog."

"He's actually leaving a review, the ungrateful little sod!!"

He Did It!

A scene from the upcoming The Taking of Pelham 4-5-6.

"Oh, God, am I housebroken."

'Honey, it's not the Feds. It's the pseudo-feds.'

'You idiot, Martin, you don't need those silly glasses to get an amazing 3-D effect. . . this is a PLAY!'

'I could have sworn it was the cavalry!!'

'Dear Dairy, Well... I met someone, and I think she could be Mrs. Alright.'

"You're not a bad dog for driving. You're a bad dog for not wearing a seat belt."

'If fate had been kinder, either of us might be living in the White House.'

Men watching TV, shouting close him down.

Escaping the Office

"I'm sorry, Mr Weinstock can't see you at the moment - he's on the run."

"I'm on Fendi and Prada, and heading toward Louis."

"The ticket's for having a cooler bike than me."

'Well, I don't happen to believe you went there.'

Spot's favorite game is "hard to pet".

'Hey! Andy actually caught it! Hang on, Andy!'

'Just my luck. I don't bark a word of French.'

"Hey, flea-bag. Lift a leg... lose a limb."