Collector Of Riches Gifts

'If I can't take it with me, I want to be BURIED with it!'

Clown on bike.

"You're on a what?!"

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

Hay Rides $10

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

"Yes, I said bring me the king. . .But not that king."

Fossil record player.

"My owner is teaching me to think before barking, which gave Federal Express plenty of time to clobber me."

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

Showing off the good china 3-7 pm.

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

A crab with a utility knife claw

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

Posh Easter Egg

"But I've seen a million wind-up monkeys. Wait! Did you say it bangs on a snare drum?"

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

'Each one is signed and numbered.'

"I went with weirdness over quantity this year."

Lavatory Waterfall

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

'This thing better hold. I don't know about you, but I don't find plan B very reassuring.'

Inflatable Hands with Index and Middle fingers showing on sale for spectators at a Sports Stadium Event

Doulton Canada Geese

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

"Whadya know, we're being audited."

"Yeah, this many ways to contact her if I'm lost might be overkill."

The dead sea scrolls

Fertility clinic open day - Man holding balloons shaped like sperm.

"It turns out our health plan does cover eyeglasses."

Med School Mascots.

'When you said you were a bee keeper...'

Monkey Business