Collectible Connoisseur Gifts

You Break It, You Buy It,

'How about if we choose teams based on who has the coolest stamp collection.'

'Now we come to what it would have been worth'

"How can I tell him we're only EPNS?"

"Just how rare? The first print run of this book, in 1935 was just 6 copies and we're still waiting for one of those to sell...."

' I hear she was quite the collector...'

'John's found it harder to kick his eBay habit than drugs.'

The Priceless Ming Vase Relays.

"If you buy the service plan, we can change the graduation date as often as neccessary."

"Next time, finish your tea before turning over the cup to check-out the mark."

"...And when the world economy collapses, we all stand up and take over! Agreed?"

"Do you think Tia Carmen will notice?"

Who will be the bigger collectible?

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

Illustrations of Shakespeare.

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

'Stamp collecting has gotten more competitive.'

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

Workout clothes: 'One size fits none.'

Doulton Canada Geese

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"I hope he's wearing pants."

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Moliere

Over-reaction Man.

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

'I'm sorry, what were you saying? I was busy critiquing your outfit?'

La Dame aux Camelias

"FYI – your camel hair blazer started it."

Charles Dickens.

Bleak House

Tosca on the balcony