Coffee Connoisseur With A Flair For The Dramatic T-Shirts

'Make those to go.'

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

'Missed again, eh, Bob? Maybe you should switch to decaf!'

Just don't let the old man get you down.

'You've had enough!'

"Of course I've been drinking!"

Somewhere in France - The Eliot sisters come face to face with escargots.

"I take it this is your first interview since the start of lockdown?"

'This patch is to quit smoking...this patch is to quit drinking...this patch is to quit drugs...this patch is to quit coffee...and this patch is to quit having any kind of fun whatsover!'

'The coffee tastes of mud. Is that why you call it 'ground' coffee?'

"Practicing my hate-face."

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

'How are we supposed to think the unthinkable if we have to drink the drinkable?'

"Eewww! It still makes a lousy cup of coffee!"

Target setting: 'What about 38%, we haven't used 38% for a while.'

'Romano, Romano, wherefore art thou Romano?'

Honest Vending Machine

"Help me on this one, Jimbo. What I want to do here is fire you."

OPERATING ROOM, 'Your husband may have a little trouble sleeping for awhile -- we spilled some coffee in him.'

An expletive of editors

'What keeps the gray whales awake during their 12,000 mile long migration.' A whale at a coffee stand says, 'Did you put the lids on tight on those 25,000 cups of coffee to go?'

'This decaf's lousy.'

Aw, @#$%, just go to business school. EMU. The Practical Muse.

Witches Brew

'Stocks rose on news engineers are close to developing a car that runs on lattes!'

'No I don't do decaf, soy lattes with a shot of vanilla!'

Difference between regular and French onion soup? "When I serve the French onion soup, I sneer."

'Looks like another typical caffeine overdose.'

"I'm supposed to sing you the specials. Do you want me to do that?"

Well, no wonder the natives are restless. They're worshipping an espresso machine!

A Passage in the Life of Mr. Watkins Tottle

"Well, team....time to trade our 'You Got This!' coffee mugs to the 'Mistakes Were Made' mugs."

Bureaucrat's Brain

'If I'm to put up with cold coffee and stale biscuits I expect a Much better line in gossip!'

"Could I have a skinny, half fat caramel infued Americano with a double shot and froth. . . but without the coffee!"