Clumsy Kid Club Pillows

'Shh, let me do the talking.'

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

The Fall of Gnome

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

Niche Extracurriculars

Man walks into 'Watch your step' sign.

Kid drops his 13 flavor ice cream cone

"I guess breakable things need to be more careful around me."

Pole Vaulting Club

"Ice rink"

"Football concussion - one beer too many at the game, and I fell off my seat."

'Quick! ontact my doctor!'

"Madeleine is always losing her contact lenses"

"The good news is I've cleaned up my office. The bad news is I think I threw out my computer."

"Sure, it's disgusting, but it's nice to have something that needs me."

'As President of the Annoying Saying Society, just let me say,,,,,enjoy,'

"Rule one of Fart Club is everyone follows through in this Fart Club."

Unlucky sculpture.

'When I get the clumsies, switch me to a sippy-cup.'

'Dad, the kid who lives here has broken your hammer with his head.'

"Would you please leave the painter alone!!!"

Girl Guided Missile

Coffee cup lids that don't fit properly and then dribble down the front of your best outfit just before the big meeting.

'We play in the cat protection league.'

Tom's car was a dump, but at least he recycled.

Potholing Club has pothole as entrance.

Lurking Men's Club

Community Church. . . Back Rubs

"What luck - it's a flyer from the Emergency Glass Repair company."

'Do they have sprouts in heaven, Miss?'

Wasp appreciation society

'Do you have this in nine wide, two left feet?'

Bull in a China Shop: You break it, you buy it,

'Ouch!'