Clipboard Enthusiast Prints

"Do you have a minute for a problem whose solution has eluded humanity since the dawn of civilization?"

"Okay, now I need your name."

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

Woman holds report: 'This has so many different fonts in it, I thougt it was a ransom note.'

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

'I think we're closing in on the missing calligrapher.'

"I see you mister mail carrier... that's it, just keep walking... don't even think abo—did you just look at my house?! Are you looking for trouble? Cujo ain't got #!@* on me."

'Could you be more specific than you feel zucky?'

A woman playing a keyboard

'You'll be broadening up your horizons in a cubicle.'

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

“The two spaces after a period were a dead giveaway.”

"Just as I thought! You used our competitor's paper for your resume!"

'OK, who moved the photocopier?'

Man has thrown his computer aside and is writing on a typewriter.

"Keep practicing, and someday you'll be able to play the two songs you remember at houses that also have pianos."

'Nice graphics.'

The Escape Key

'We don't know what the final result will look like, but the movie rights have already been optioned.'

'It's not encrypted, Captain. That's just the clerk's usual typing.'

"Anyway, to make a long story short, I'm the guy who invented CliffsNotes."

The Colonel reading Clive's letters to the ladies of the regiment.

'No, go ahead and critique my mss. I'm always ok ... after the initial reaction.'

'Can you redo this manuscript, John, and make it less stupid?'

Seinfeld: The Early Years.

"Well, no wonder you can't think! There's your brain over there on the floor!"

Inuit post arriving by parachute.

"I'm hooking up with this guy who makes the funniest typos."

"I've been a postie for 20 years. . ."

Writer breaks in new electric typewriter.

Just don't mention his size. He's so case-sensitive. D D d

The origins of bullet points.

'This week's column is going to be about Writer's Block, and it's...'

"Yeah, the Declaration of Independence is beautiful! What font is that?"