Clever Graffiti Appreciators Pillows

Campus police are dorm troopers.

Gay Times...

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

"That'll be five bucks."

'He took from the rich and gave to the poor? It sounds like wealth redistribution.'

"They're so like us."

'I imagine you'll be asking for a full refund.'

"She's a miniature."

"Friends have been scribbling on my cast."

Stop Ironic Graffiti

"What do you mean Halloween ISN'T a paid holiday off?!"

From Here You Can See Bugger All

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

Forbidden Vegetable

"That's my novel."

Peacekeeping?

'I keep yelling at my privates.'

"You're not the sleeping beauty I fell in love with."

"If I had known I was going to evolve, I would have worked on my beach bod."

"All the world's gotta do is look at me once, and I'll tap dance until I die."

"What a darling chihuahua! Is he friendly?"

Chicken comedians.

Getting employees involved in decision making can help give them a sense of ownership. Sometimes, a little too much.

Cosmetic pouches.

"I'm leaving you,Jerry-I need more from a man than just scintillating conversation."

'IT'S NOT YOU!'

Unpopular Street Signs: Live más, Exit, No Trespassing, No Loitering on this Property Violators Will Be Let Go.

ASBOs

'I hate to tell you this, but there was a hole in my pocket, and I lost the budget surplus.'

Monster Buskers

"Remind me again, did the President say that or was it the Kardashians?"

"Boneless, gluten free, vegan, grass fed, free range, bananas."