Clerical Work Pillows

"Hello. I'm here to install the new pastor."

Widgets, Inc: Inventory. . . Sales. . .RETURNS.

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Staff support"

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

"Guess who brought king cake!"

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"You may now kiss the bride..."

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

Priest's 'To do' list.

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

Golfing Bishop.

'So it's with a heavy heart that I leave you good people of St. Paul's and accept the calling to be minister at the Sunnydell Nudist Colony...'

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

"...until death do you a favor."

In and Out Tray

"Today we studied Matthew, the first in a four-part series."

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

Desk Boxes: 'In', 'Out', 'Could Go Either Way'.

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

Toy Shops and Educated Children

"...And do you promise if you ever should divorce that you'll remain friends?"

A child interrupting family prayers

'No, smart guy -- it means all of them at once!'

'I've got two tickets to Handel's Messiah -- What time do you get off work?'