Clean Eating Comic Pillows

"I guess that thirty days of clean eating thing you're doing really flushes out your ability to talk about anything else."

"Where do we put Desserts?"

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

Night of the Latkes

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

'It's the report from the consultant. He says we should turn over the turnovers to improve turnover.'

All Natural Nothing

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

Thou Shalt Not!

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

'Our chickens are a real 'come back' story: raised organic, they hooked up with some seedy fowl, but then, thankfully, were saved by massive doses of antibiotics.'

Man Trying to Uncork Champagne.

Onion operation.

"Why don't I clang some utensils, make 3 grilled cheese sandwiches and we call it an early night?"

'How do you stop a fish from smelling?'

"She's losing a lot of cream cheese. We're going to have to cut her open."

'Say, Hon. . . the pizza's burning.'

Amy Sedaris

Bottomless bowl of soup

"I want to apologise for calling this meeting on such short notice."

Papa's Pizza delivered in under 30 minutes.

"A votre sante!"

"I've had enough sweets for one day."

'We've run out of Parmesan cheese.' Food in pasta.

"Let's take this one step at a time. First, somebody is going to have to catch the fish."

"Your fish ... I'm sorry, but there will be a slight delay."

"Here's to us, kid—and the healing powers of raw juices."

"What fly?"

"Is the slop fresh?"