Classroom Leaders Gifts

'If I'm elected class president, can I overrule the teacher?'

Children's education

'Who I played in Summer Stock.'

The full moon frenzy strikes again."

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

'Long term I want student achievement to increase. Short time I want a cup of coffee and a biscotti.'

'Actually, nowadays it's considered offensive to call an answer 'wrong'.'

'Well, when you mess up on the job, you know where you stand with me.'

Too much homework: kid with two backpacks.

"'How to Buy Tickets on Bezos' Spaceship so You Can Live to See Your Teens,' by Chloe Butler."

Teacher's pet dog

'You can't blame the kids for being restless when we have math teachers teaching French, and English teachers teaching science.'

I'm in the den mom, reading the newspaper for social studies class.

J.P.Hensmore Superintendent AKA Head Honcho, The Big Guy,The Man, Numero Uno and The Big Cheese.

'That's the bell for round two.'

Lessons.

'I give the same advice to all new teachers. Pretend you know what you are doing.'

The Ideal Teacher.

"I circulate around the classroom to make sure the class runs smoothly. I need a pair of comfortable walking shoes."

'It has cut down on note-passing, glancing at fellow students' test papers and spitballs.'

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

"Thanks for your report on flamingos Johnny."

"It's the superintendent's idea of alternative dispute resolution."

"I try to get a head start on them."

'Teachers' Dreams.''Did you just say F***? Care to repeat it so everyone can hear you or is even a four letter word beyond your abilities? ... And the state expects me to make you multisyllabic.'

"I said 'I quit'. Nobody listens to me any more."

'Parents have been complaining that I'm too strict? You want me to be a little less intimidating? Do you want me to send students to your office 47 times a day? I'm a 67-year-old woman dealing with 16-year-old thugs....

'If you don't do your homework, you'll be a child left behind.'

"So how was your first day of teaching?"

Parents teacher conference.

'I'd like to overwhelm them with instructional excellence, but I'm not above winning through intimidation.'

"Just teachers' lounge will suffice, Ed."

"Who gives you homework?"

"So, Mrs. Miller, would you tell me briefly your methods for teaching reading, your overall philosophy of education, your views on testing, your ideas on discipline, your opinions about homework, the ways you could excite kids about science, and how you would upgrade math skills in our school should you be hired?"