Classroom Comedy Pillows

"It's his first day of school!"

"Let me know if that level of medication is effective. And if we need to, we can give some to the student as well."

'Teachers' Dreams.' 'Young man, either you remove your hand from under her sweater or I will remove it your arm.'

"No, you don't have a fever, so yes you do have to go to school today. . . Remember, you're the teacher!"

"This isn't working. Do you have an ink eraser?"

"Hard summer, Miss Donahue?"

A Puppet Named Juan

Ethics exam cheater.

I should be a writer when I grow up...

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

Billy, can you deliver your show 'n tell this time without the fog machine?

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

'So what are you studying, young man?'

'Right, who threw that?' (giant pupil in class).

'What begins with 'E'? Well, 'Everything'!'

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

"Baldo, you're a very good artist! You should put your talent to use."

'My science project is an experiment in static electricity.'

'This test doesn't understand me.'

"He said he doesn't want to see me in his office again..."

"Your rule about no yelling out in class...that's a violation of my 1st Amendment rights!"

Aerodynamics Lecture room.

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

'An essay on what I did last summer? -- I was hoping to let all that stuff blow over.'

"How can I be a lead learner without the technology needed to lead?"

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.