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Volcano Danger: 'We are shutting down your Wright Brothers exhibit until Andy's volcano is dormant again.'

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

'Ms. Shelby, I think you're spinning out of control.'

'I guess what happens in Kindergarten, doesn't stay in Kindergarten.'

Global Education

"Fear not, Miss Hathaway. Just go home and listen to a cd of howling wolves or screeching monkeys and by Monday you'll be ready for your 3rd grade class."

Beginning of the school year

It could be worse -- there could be 35 teachers for every student

"Alice, please! You're a practice teacher! At some point I have to leave you alone with them!"

'Did I throw which spitball?'

School boy

"Since I'm your favorite student, do I even have to take this test?"

'Why? The year just started! She's not in any trouble. . . Ok. . . yet.'

"The kindergarteners have breached their classroom confines, and are headed this way. We'll be overrun within minutes. What should we do?"

Announcement over school PA: 'We're going to begin this week with an all-school search for Mr. Ridley - last Friday's substitute teacher.'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'It was neat! - they have flat-screen blackboards!'

'A sinkhole ate my homework...?'

'I did have an eventful day at school, but nothing, in my opinion, to write home about.'

'I look forward to my first year as a teacher. I wrote lesson plans, attended in-service workshops, and decorated my classroom. Preparation is half the victory. It's the other half that scares me.'

Never declare a food fight on artichoke day!

'Ok, who threw that?'

'Since I put you on report Tuesday, Simkins, I've collected this lot!'

Gesundheit! Your allergies to chalk acting up again, Ms. Weatherspoon?

'Topping it all off, parents now want us to see if we can bring in UN Peace Keepers.'

"I had a very trying day. I tried annoying my teacher, I tried annoying the principal..."

'I'm afraid Miss Johnson has lost control of her class!'

"This is going to be a fun year."

"I think Mr. Jackson is dismissing the class!"

'It was animal day at school...I had a dog, Merry had a cat, Robert had a tarantula, and the teacher had a cow.'

"Miss Perkins, I need more lumbar support."

"Hey! This is my seat! I sit at the front every year!"

'I think my teacher is very devoted. She always says she's more interested in the outcome than her income.'