Classic Battle Reenactor Gifts

"It troubles me that we're being led into battle by a person wearing a bow tie."

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

Piracy on a boating lake

Warrior Woman

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

"I think you'll find the pen is writier than the sword."

Missing You.

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

'I think they're up to something.'

"Hear ye! Hear ye! Look, having nuclear - my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at M.I.T. - good genes, very good genes, O.K., very smart. . ."

Mortally Wounded at the Battle of Quebec, General James Wolfe Forgets His Last Words

'We will not be disarmed by gun control! We will not be stripped naked and left at the mercy of a tyrannical government!'

Goddess

'Damn, I knew that disabled access would be our undoing.'

"But I use all of them!"

'The knights are drawing closer'

"But if we win and the Visigoths lose then we're the wild card."

"Young Montague's full of himself."

"If we're musketeers, why can't we just shoot people? with muskets?"

Siege of Vicksburg - Sappers Approach Confederate Fortifications

Gaah! You sank my longship!

"The British are coming. Just sayin'."

The Use of Cavalry

"We've been victorious in many battles, and yet helmet hair remains our fiercest foe."

"Go back! The place is full of mold!"

Gladstone ignoring Russian atrocities not suited to his party's political purposes

'And you said he'd shoot his eye out with a BB Gun!'

'After A Knights Hard Day'

Servant unscrews knight from his suit of armour.

"Dad, it's Friday. Can I borrow the siege tower tonight?"