City Budget Officer T-Shirts

'Obsolete: Any state of the art equipment you bought last year for $250,000.'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

"Who's got the hammer?"

The Henderson's move to a vertical city took some getting used to.

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

Where are they now?: Office of Management & Budget - Grumpy.

"I can always tell when Philip is working on family finances. A 'cursor' appears on both sides of the computer screen."

'You earned this corner office by cutting corners...'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Fiscal cliff - US dollar falling over the edge.

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

Businessman sees door sign 'Department of Mismanagement and Overbudget'.

"You need to justify your own existence first."

'I'm afraid the cuts are beginning to bite!'

'We're asking what america can do without to reduce the deficit...no, ma'ma! the Gop and Dems are not options!'

"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% budget allocation."

"How is the budget forecast looking?"

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'

"We may have to rob from the rich AND the poor."

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

"What comes after zillion?"

An Everyday Explanation of the Federal Budget.

And this is a little ditty I wrote called 'the third quarters profit and loss account' ...Colin often wished that he'd followed his first love and taken up a career as a musician

'Welcome! You are now in Shambles!'

'I wonder how the economy is doing.'

"Unfortunately the first thing they cut was the stationery budget..."

'We spend a lot, borrow a lot, tax a lot. It keeps things from getting boring.'

City Finance Dept: My Way/The Highway

Excess Baggage: Sooner or later all those vacation bills come due.

'Let's go home and come back next year. It's Ground Hog Deficit!'

"Will you stop saying 'ouch' every time I cut something out of your budget?"