Cinematic Commentator T-Shirts

"Jackie Chan is great, but John Woo is God."

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

"Ours is not a creative clan."

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

"Lori, go ahead and toss in 'Lolita.' Now, what's next?" "We'll need more lighter fluid." "'The Lottery' is devils work." "We must protect the children." "Book burning club"

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

"The regular Fox news commentator was canned for being too soft on Iran. I'm Dick Cheney."

"Whoever made Keir Starmer did a sound professional job."

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

Please enjoy this culturally, ethnically, religiously and politically correct cartoon responsibly.

Standard endings for sci-fi movies...

"‘Click’, you have reached the White House, press 1 for shameless groveling, 2 for presidential pardons, and please have your credit card details ready..."

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

Spot the Difference - God/Uncle Sam

"And then on ab day they roll on their backs, flail, and mimic us in the throes of death."

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

The President Elect approved by 3 out of 4 talk show hosts!

'The recession is over, again.'

"Yes, we voted remain - how did you guess?"

"Don't editorialize."

"Still, he might be remembered as the 'no cloning' President."

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

Sensitivity Reader's Digest

'Cartoonist thinking'

"I've considered portraiture, but everyone is so ugly."

'He speaks for our entire generation. Pity he's such a bore...'

"I can hear Brooklyn becoming played out."

The Decline of Europe

Da Vinci painting a grumpy version of Mona Lisa.

"What's an imagination? It was something kids used to enjoy before they invented video games."

King Solomon's Pollster.

'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'

The revolution that hit Hollywood hardest:The Thinking Pictures."

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."