Cinema Snarker T-Shirts

More Ideas for Term Limits

"Batman v Superman" was just awful. Just AWFUL! Wait

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

Working in the Hazard Zone!

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

Movie Awards. Winner. It's been a big night for Ernie! He won three times at the movie-set caterer awards! On one set he made a healthy, refreshing beverage that received rave reviews from the cast and crew. He won the "best pitcher" award for it. Did they say he won for best costumes? No, his dressings won. His sticky buns won also. For "best leading roll" performance, right? No, for best "cinnamontography"!

Hey, how was space? Fine. Jeez. The adolescent astronaut.

'Which channel would you like to tut at tonight?'

"Well, you can't say they didn't warn us."

"Get those things away from me- I can't stop eating them."

"I'm not sure what to watch...'Enterprise' or 'Sabado Gigante.'"

"'Superman legacy' was awful. Just awful!"

One Thing is Free

The First Art Critic

"I think I'll just leave a hate tip."

'Waiter, this salad is obnoxious!' 'But, sir — you asked for French dressing!'

City Camps

Mega-Corp Pictures. How should we promote the disaster movie about a disease epidemic? A viral campaign.

"Film blanc."

'Don't kid yourself. If you're too ugly to be cooked, they'll grind you up into one of those fish protein concentrates.'

'It's just a few things your concession stand doesn't carry - fried chicken, potato salad, pumpkin pie...'

"Great DVD extras!"

"I don't care if it is the best value... next time we're just getting a MEDIUM popcorn!"

Cull people who eat big bags of potato chips during a movie.

"My compliments to yhe liquidator - that was terrible."

Mega Corp Pictures. A Batman musical? "Riddler on the roof"!

"How to Look, Feel & Sound like Shit"

"My compliments to your chefs - their broth was disgusting."

'Well I think we've nearly broken the back of this 'risk assessment'.'

"And the winner of the second clapper board electrician's assistant is..."

OK, OK, you can have it for a nickel, but I won't go a cent lower. Maybe.

'Maybe I give off a little ammonia, but at least I don't smell like people!'

"I just don't have it in me today..." "Well, aren't you the lucky one."

"The Breakfast of Politicians. Low in character and moral fiber."

"I really prefer the place across the street. The cockroaches are smaller."