Cinema Projectionist T-Shirts

Mona Lisa Letter Box Edition.

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

Herman Mankiewicz

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

Horror movies

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

'This should be perfect. The main characters fall in love during a series of explosions.'

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"Snow White! It's the dancing, singing woodland creatures wondering if you want to go down the pub."

'There's nothing on.'

"Bloody hell!"

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"Hugh fans!"

"...You talking to me? Well, I'm the only one here... You talking to me?!" "Narcissus De Niro"

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

Applause

"Housekeeping?!"

"The Eggsorcist"

'Play it again, Sam.'