Chronic Delegator Gifts

"What a day. The man I pass the buck to was off sick."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

God's Subcontractors

Paperwork No Me Gusta.

"Never do today what someone else can do tomorrow."

'As my subordinate, naturally I expect you to take the heat on things that otherwise would make me uncomfortable.'

'Ah, Williams, are you familiar with the term ‘Poisoned Chalice'?'

'I start my day by making a list of everything I need to do . . . and who I can get to do it for me.'

"I learned early, if at first you don't succeed, delegate."

"I'm going to need your room cleaned by end-of-day."

No need for you to read this. You seem to have got it to a fine art.

In Tray, Out Tray and Not My Job Tray

"Find out who's on vacation and then add this stuff to the workload on his desk."

Serious business

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

"Can I add just one more project to your workload?"

"I don't get it. I hired him to workout for me every day, and I still haven't lost any weight."

"At my age I prefer to delegate the blood, sweat and tears."

"I don't have scientific breakthroughs. I have people who do that for me."

"I'm training him to do chores."

'Perhaps this graph will help you appreciate the jagged mountain range I climbed on my vacation.'

"THIS looks like a job for ... somebody else."

"My management style is to hire good employees and then get out of the way while they work."

Man with two in trays on his desk asks man with two out trays; 'Shouldn't one of those be mine?'

'Never put off till tomorrow what you can delegate today.'

"Do you want the boss or somebody who knows what they are talking about?"

Statesman, Scientist, Author and Treky.

An agony of aunts

"This is a problem."

Problems roll off my back and slide into Plotkins' office.

"Look, if it's just a matter of collating get one of the clerks to do it."

"Hey, why can't I get any help with this paperwork?!"

"Hey, I built the nest. You feather it."

'These days I prefer to delegate the blood, sweat and tears.'

"Here are my notes on collateralized debt obligation. Make me sound like I know what I'm talking about."