Christmas Comedy Fans T-Shirts

Santa Claus reads a newspaper while Rudolph's head is mounted on a wall behind him.

"You're gonna be happy to learn your husband's annual overnight disappearances have a perfectly innocent explanation, Mrs. Claus."

Elves in the Closet

Claus on the Santa phone.

'I'm a Tasmanian Devil, so no, I didn't make Santa's good-list again this year...'

"We don't care about his nose. We won't let him play because he's not vaccinated and won't wear a mask!"

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

"Donner and Blitzen are just our stage names."

"I don't care who's naughty or nice anymore-I only keep track of who's crossed me."

'Santas Ponzi Scheme'

"Doesn't it seem like we just finished letting the air out of last year's tree?"

"Sorry I'm late. We were delayed when Rudolph caught a drone in his antlers."

Notice! Due to COVID, all reindeer games are postponed indefinitely.

'Didn't I warn you not to have the vindaloo?'

'Never mind the price, what the hell is myrhh?'

'...So I figured with all of this free cooling why not install a data center?'

"The Three Wise Men followed a star...wasn't their GPS working?"

Visit Santa today...sponsored by Acme Razor Company

I may have a belly full of jelly, but trust me, no one is faster at going through duct work.

Santa incorporates therapy into his repertoire.

About Santa 2017.

"Well, I ain't flyin' next to him!"

'Don't worry, I come in peace today: Merry Christmas!'

Santa Hat Hair

"Claus Trophobia"

"Has your husband been exposed to Christmas at all?"

"Just answer the question, sir. Is it true that you're not planning to watch 'It's a Wonderful Life' this holiday season?"

"I thought you might like to have a merrier brain for the new millennium!"

Don't fly and text.

Hand emerges from King Arthur's xmas pudding with a coin.

'Santa's blotto.'

Ho! Ho! Ho! From North Pole.

"Rudolph will be ready to go by Christmas. I'm charging his nose and installing new software."