Chord Chasers T-Shirts

'I don't think he sucks so much as his influences suck.'

Cimafunk

Sales chart is buildings in background.

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

"Right, before we look at the covid figures for today, do we need another sheet of paper?"

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is, none of us will be alive then.'

Learn Guitar In 6 Easy Lessons: Add another fifty difficult ones!

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

ACME Balloon Company.

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

"Let's try for dignified yet playful, while maintaining the spirit of preservation."

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

'Perkins, you really know to suck the joy out of a 3rd quarter report.'

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

"Check out this new store."

"I never dreamed I'd ever enjoy watching my figure this much."

"Thank you, Harris - I get the picture."

'And right here they merged...'

Greatest hits, Greatest Misses.

"Oh, I can't complain"

Letter writing lady.

Dragon Graph

Sales Chart: Boomerangs LTD

"We've met our target on a 25% uplift in sales but that still leaves us 100% bankrupt."

'This is why we can't have nice things... '

'And you'll be pleased to notice, sir, that we had to eliminate the top of the chart.'

'Our fund lost millions, but the good news is our management fees are not based on performance.'

"This is where things started getting really weird."

'Damn! McGee's good!'

'86.4% of people use phony statistics to get their point across.'

"We could try 'gravity' as an excuse."

'One thing is certain. It's not just a seasonal slump.'