Choco-champion T-Shirts

'I know! I know! But if I can beat chocolate, you can beat heroin!'

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Olivia just hacked into the boy scouts' site and sold them 30,000 boxes of cookies.

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

The price of chocolate has gone through the roof!

"I'm sorry madam, we're right out of Mississippi mud pie. All that's left is the Severn sludge souffle."

The Little Engine that really shouldn't, she already had one of Evelyn's cheesecake brownies, she couldn't possibly, O.K. maybe just one.

'She's dealing multiple prescriptions. This is the 3rd pharmacy today where she got these highly addictive Chocolate Bits.'

"Yes, I know that chocolate comes from the cocoa Bean...but that does NOT count as a vegetable!"

'This is DESTROYING my manicure, Steve!'

"Whosoever pulleth this sword from this stone, and can eat just two or three of these double-chocolate Amaretto things without finishing the whole box, shall be king born of England!"

"The doctor said it wouldn't hurt to fudge a little on my diet."

"I need a box of the gayest chocolate you've got."

'I don't mind if I spill vegetables, but I hate it when I spill dessert.'

Dessert Storm Veteran

"Let's see if there's another witch's cottage with a better candy selection."

"Hey Mom... we're all out of junk food!"

The best baker in Bath!

'Yum! Humans are hiding huge chocolate eggs in their gardens today...'

"It just isn't Halloween unless you push your body to the brink of diabetes."

'Yes, they do contain e-numbers - But they're e-numbers that make you feel amorous!'

Sign on the door at Karate School.

'Chew each bite ten times? †I'm a busy man!'

Don't binge and drive.

'...mix porridge oats, butter, and golden syrup...Rurghh!...then bake for fifteen minutes'?! Oh well, maybe next lifetime, Delia...'

Did anyone tell you you're a great cook?

Pirates of the Carob Bean. Hand over all your chocolate substitute ingredients!

"Waiter, these chopsticks are not cooperating."

"With a little fiscal stimulation..."

'This diet is killing me! -- Last night I dreamed that I ate Willy Wonka!'

Candies and diet pills

Sign at a border crossing saying "Welcome to the U.S.A. - We'll put M&M's in anything!"

'Another October 30, another failed Halloween candy sleepover.'