Children's Welfare Gifts

Man pumping 'Ritlain' into a Child Behaviour Clinic,

Policeman talking to lost child

'Hello, NSPCA?. . .Listen our school only does chips once a week.'

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"When is my next parole hearing?"

Humans...What is their purpose?

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

Support group for sheep.

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

Endangered wildlife 'Lost' posters stuck on trees surrounded by rubbish

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

"We’re a lending aquarium."

He acts all cool and feral until the can of food comes out. Jingle jingle jingle.

The Golfing Accident

"Be kind"

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

'Don't be embarrassed by your anti-barking collar, implanted tracking chip, and GPS device. Just think of them as fashion accessories.'

In case of Emergency: Break Glass

'He has a big heart. . . inviting his homeless friends in to stay dry.'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

Like lambs to the slaughter, my ass.

'I said 'Shall I put the cat out?''

'Why is it he never understands sit , stay or down, but understands spayed and neutered?'

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

"This is why I want you to remember the three most important words in the world: spay, neuter, adopt."

Achiever: An illustration of how many thoughts she can have in a split second, while still listening to him.

'You see, we don't have any children, so he's kind of our baby.'

"I think I'm beginning to embrace humiliation."

'Not a word to Alfred, but the spare bedroom is worth losing the fourteen pounds!'

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

'I know I'm not a kitten, I know I'm sorta fat, But if you will adopt me, I'll be your lovin' cat.' Caption:Shelter Cat Blues

'We've tried everything else without success and have now made the decision to adopt.'